What the heck is a Nissan Kicks?

"GreenN_Gold" (GreenN_Gold) 07/20/2018 at 16:50 • Filed to: None

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Just saw a commercial for a Nissan Kicks. Never heard of it.

Is it the new Juke basically? Looks like the Juke has been removed from Nissan’s website.

HammerheadFistpunch > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 16:53

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Sub Juke. Think CH-R, Soul, HR-V, etc.  

For Sweden > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 16:54

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LOREM IPSUM > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 16:58

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You too can carry 4 flight cases of vinyl records in your suv and get lost in an industrial park!

#stopappropriatingDJculture

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > For Sweden 07/20/2018 at 17:00

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4/5? fuck off C&D

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 17:01

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Nissan’s Urban Millennial Transportation device.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 17:06

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I just drove a Rogue for a week, I’m still trying to figure out what it is, a small SUV? A tall car? A blob with seats?

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 07/20/2018 at 17:06

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They explain it so:

This is the way the world is. Not how it should be or could be—but is.

HIGHS

Kicky design, top-kick interior, tech is a kick, kickin’ available stereo, kickass pricing.

LOWS

Soft-kick drivetrain, more kick than bite in the corners, should be more of a kick.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time 07/20/2018 at 17:08

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Really? I can’t actually visit it on my work PC for some reason. The Car Connection (??) gives it 5.2/10 on the google search bar, which sounds more reasonable.

If C&D did say that, I’d want to give them a kick in the nuts.

Cé hé sin > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 17:10

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A Juke, but less so.

for Michigan > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time 07/20/2018 at 17:44

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Nah, this is a total Boomer-mobile.

for Michigan > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 17:45

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It’s the less-weird/more-beige replacement for the Juke.

GreenN_Gold > HammerheadFistpunch 07/20/2018 at 17:45

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Dang, and the Juke was pretty tiny, at least in the back and cargo hold.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 17:54

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I sat in the back seat of a Juke once. They had to cut me out with the Jaws of L ife.

404 - User No Longer Available > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 18:04

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A Juke that doesn’t stab your eyes but will hypnotize you instead.

ThePlasticOne - no diggities expressed nor implied. > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 18:45

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The Juke replacement no one asked for.

LOREM IPSUM > LOREM IPSUM 07/20/2018 at 19:08

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#SecretAgentMa'am

Jayvincent > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 19:18

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Strangely, I don’t hate it... yet. 125 HosePower, 115 Torks, Criminally Variable Transmission... now I hate it. $ 18-20k depending on how you order it. 

The Crazy Kanuck; RIP Oppositelock > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 19:50

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*Angry noises* 

SHARPSPEED > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time 07/20/2018 at 20:05

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They lost any credibility when they described the design as “kinky”.

SHARPSPEED > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 20:08

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Nissans always struck me as a company ran by stereotypical Business McM oneybags old guys who probably spend all day in the board room measuring eachother’s dicks with rulers that have the centimeters labeled as inches. Because only that kinda detachment would think “Kicks” was a hip and cool name for another soulless CUV.

Tristan > GreenN_Gold 07/20/2018 at 23:46

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Yet another boring CUV for a market super- saturated with boring CUVs. It has an engine, wheels, seats, a shitty infotainment system, and a pseudo functional, optional  AWD system. It is unique, sporty and edgy just like the other 3,752 unique, sporty and edgy CUVs available on the market.